The Key to Successful Habit Change? Get to Know Yourself Better

Let’s be real: changing habits is hard work. Altering the fundamental patterns of our everyday lives is a pain because our brains are wired to take short cuts whenever possible.

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach with habit formation. A night owl, for example, might never stick to the habit of going for an early morning run. But it’s no use dwelling on it. By embracing your unique quirks, you can successfully make or break a habit for good.

Upholders respond well to all expectations, whether they come from other people or from within. Motivated by fulfillment, upholders always want to know what the rules are and what’s expected of them.

If you’re an upholder, you wake up and ask, “What’s on the to-do list today?” Consider yourself lucky: cultivating habits is usually a breeze for you and simple scheduling often does the trick in both making a breaking a habit. If it’s in the calendar, it happens.

Sometimes overly concerned with following the rules, upholders are a rare breed, much like rebels (the polar opposite of upholders). Most people are either obligers or questioners.

Obligers meet outer expectations but struggle to meet internal ones. It’s difficult for them to self-motivate and, instead, obligers are driven by external accountability. They respond to the question, “What’s expected of me today?”

Can’t find time to run? Get a colleague to motivate you to log the miles at lunchtime. Struggling to stick to your weekly workout goals? Use a habit tracking app or platform like stickK where you have to put money in line.

Questioners, true to their name, question all expectations; they’ll do a task if it makes sense to them. Motivated by sound reasons, questioners won’t follow rules which seem arbitrary.

If this category rings true, then your trigger question is, “What needs to get done today and why?” If you make up your mind to do something, you’re usually good at sticking to it. Essentially, you need to turn all expectations into internal ones in order to endorse the idea from within.

Motivated by the moment, rebels defy all forms of control, even self-control. They often frustrate others – and even themselves – but every workplace needs these non-conformists who disrupt archaic processes.

As a rebel, you’re very much in touch with your needs. You start the day by asking, “What do I want to do today?” You dread habits, but can engage in habit-like behavior by tying a habit with the idea of freedom. Basically, you trick yourself into thinking that whatever you’re doing is your choice. If there’s one tendency that embodies the ‘one day at a time’ philosophy, it’s the rebel.

So which one are you: upholder, obliger, questioner, or rebel? Yes, the categories overlap and you are likely to have a different tendency depending on the context. If you want to create sustainable habit change, however, you need to tune into your motivations.